Thank God 2020 has ended. I can’t honestly say its been the worst year of my life…because that was last year. This year has been so hard for so many. But we have all stuck together and gotten through it!
2020 will go down as one of the most depressing years of all. Whenever the television was switched on, it was case after case of Coronavirus and then death after death. So many loved ones lost to this horrible virus. In some cases this brough people together and in others it caused a divide. I want to talk about the pros and cons lockdown had on people, including myself. This year has been a massive challenge especially for peoples mental health.
My lockdown didn’t start off great, because I found out that my church at time knew my abuser was working in another church and said “its not their job to protect other people”. So I stood up for myself and all the other girls at risk. I left the church as that was the last straw. Then they sent an email stating I was not allowed to go there and my friends were not allowed to talk to me…..BUT the abuser and his family were still allowed to attend! Let that sink in! While all this was going on they were preaching about mental health and being there for people. Not only were/are they covering up sexual assault they were being hippercrits. The toll it had on my mental health was seriously bad. To this day I don’t know how I go through it. But thats why I am never going into an Elim church again!
The pro’s of lockdown
1. Taking time out before burning out. – I found that when we went into lockdown I felt a lot of pressure and anxiety come off my shoulders. My brain and body had time to relax and calm down. I wasn’t on edge, and anxious about bumping into my abuser and his family and friends. I finally felt safe staying in my home knowing they couldn’t go out. (This I know wasn’t the same for everyone).
2. Spending more time with loved ones- Alot of people don’t get to spend alot of time with their loved ones due to commitments like work. The lockdown has given them a chance to spend quality time with their partner and/or children. Making new memories that they might not ever had the chance to make.
3. Protecting others- We did what we were told and stayed in and protected the NHS and others around the country. This act showed how selfless humanity can be.
4. Taking up hobbies- Lots of people found new hobbies during lockdown. I always found it amazing when looking at social media to see what new activites people had found. For example: Writing, Horse Riding, Completing online degrees, Drawing, Knitting and lots more. How amazing is that espcially when some where new life skills!
5. Dicovering the amazing Dr Jessica Taylor!- Dr Jessica Taylor released a book during lockdown called “Why women are blamed for everything”. It is to help other women and girls who have gone through sexual violence. I have read this book and it is amazing! It opened my eyes to other oppertunites and other ways of thinking. It is a massive help and I would recommend it getting it. It also allowed me to discover Victim Focus he organisation, which I believe every survive of abuse would benifit from visiting online.
6. Finding closure of some sort- Some people like myself were able to find closure to past trauma and problems. I managed to find a new,safe, loving church and managed to stand up for myself to my old one. I worked on myself through lockdown with ALOT of self care and it really paid off. I know their are alot of people out there that focussed on self care and I am very proud of the them. If this is you, know that I am very proud of how far you have come.
These examples were only a few pros that lockdown had for some of us. Maybe you can relate to all of them or maybe just one. For some Lockdown had more cons then pros. Below will be a few examples of these.
The Con’s of Lockdown
1. A rise in Domestic Violence- If you have never experienced any type of violence/abuse then you are very lucky. Some people however during lockdown were stuck at home with their abusers. Normally home is a safe place for people. But if your in a domestically abusive relationship then it is the one place that isn’t safe. Cases grew by 20% and was called the silence killer of lockdown. Many men and women who found work and socialising as a way of escaping their abuser, suddenly found themselves cut off from it. Luckly charities and the police became aware of this silent killer increasing and started to take action and put things in place to help victims.
2. Deaths from Covid 19- We all know that Covid 19 can be deadly and that we need to take precautions when going out. Unfortunatly we all know someone that has sadly died from Covid. It was great to see the death rate decrease, but now its starting to increase rapidly again and at an alarming rate! We all need to protect eachother at this difficult time. Especially by looking out for people who have just lost someone.
3. Job loss- Many people have unfortunatly lost their jobs due to the pandemic. This has led to many more unfortunate events. This is something no one could have predicted. Family businesses going out of business, firms making people redundant. Alot of of people where saved by the Furlough scheme which I think is one of the best decisions made by the goverment. This leads on to the next point.
4. Declining in mental health-During the pandemic there has been a masive decline in peoples mental health. This has been due to job losses, deaths, the unknown and many other factors. A very important one is isolation and lonlieness. Many people especially university students and the elderly had this as their main problem. But thankfully kind people made a difference and helped them when they could. The goverment have become aware of the mental health crisis and hopefully they will put some procedures in place to help everyone whos mental health has been effected.
So thats my mini round up of the year. Lets hope 2021 is better than last year. I hope you are all okay and if you need help in this time, then to reach out to someone you trust or an organisation!
Be Kind and Stay Safe